How can i make my ex gay bf return?

Is he out to his family and friends? If not, maybe that's why he is not that affectionate in public. If so, it sounds like he is just not treating you as well as he should be. If he likes his boyfriends to dress up in girls clothing, that's just something that he's into, it doesn't necessarily mean that he's ashamed of being gay or secretly likes girls. However, if you are not comfortable with wearing those clothes or with being with a guy who wants you to dress that way, then you should probably move on.